AVOCADO PIE- It Was Horse Slobber Green- From Worzel

It was the month of my birthday..though I never got worked up over the thought, or longed for anything bought.  Cards came from my brothers Cudberth and Inkerman far away, and two weeks early my sister Fillipendula, who every year got the wrong day.    And it happened to be, a year we had Godfrey with us for a stay.   He filled life’s quiet corners, seemed to smooth the old linoleum, warmed the slightly warped floors of our cozy flat.  His chatter reminded me how blessed was my life, and I thanked Godfrey for that.

This morning I awoke to the great, deep voice of our landlady, Mrs Feerce out in the hall, griping very loudly of a dryer lint ball. Godfrey had crept out in his modest flowered drawers, on my behalf to put a spider outdoors.

Proudly trotting back to his cup of tea inside, he met up with Mrs Feerce, of whom he was quite terrified.   “She’s a horrible thing on her neck, and accent I cannot understand”  “She cornered me on the landing with nasty dryer lint in her hand”         “She shrilled it could catch fire and we all wake up die”  “Happy Birthday, dear Worzel I will bake for you today, Avocado Pie”

Calm now restored, his joy of baking undaunted, soon my Garnet thumped a gift down and left to mind the shop, I could read all day, it was a book that I wanted.

Ah, bliss fair!, curled up warm, in my turquoise chair, though I still heard the voice of Mrs Feerce outside, Malanky!!, Malank! dryer lint in underpant!!.

He made Avocado Pie did Godfrey, said “I had no limes but mashed the avocado, made a trip across town for dates and a mango, found where you hid the chocolate and the lard”.    “For the crust used ground almonds, the only thing hard, was the color- Horse Slobber Green- which I made a pretty sage shade with plenty of whipped cream”.

For each year we had been friends he piped a swerzel with care, and a blue plastic dinosaur plap in the middle, a Triceratops he had found somewhere.

Godfrey wrote- After tea I retired  abed for to write.  Left my friends alone to enjoy their night, heard the stritch of the needle dropping soft to records groove, heard the turquoise chair scrape, so heavy to move, the music started up, a waltz in four four time..they sang “Avocado Pie, made without a lime”

Sang, “We ate the whole thing with nary a spoon, then we danced, bare feet thudding across the living room” “They danced late into the night, at dark of the moon”.  It was the best birthday ,ever, of the many I have seen, and we all ate Avocado Pie-  Horse Slobber Green….


2 thoughts on “AVOCADO PIE- It Was Horse Slobber Green- From Worzel

  1. Sheila, I’ve recently become aware of how your words conspire to create a mood for each post, each different from the others. In this one: a feeling of comfort, of taking pleasure in small, familiar things, of understanding from whence happiness flows. Yet each post shares the humor that is readily available in everything you write and the lovable characters you create.

  2. Thanks Janet- I have always tried to never lose sight of encounters that are nonsense- my co-worker often brings us baked treats from recipes bent to please health food types, the latest being Avocado Lime Pie- very tasty, very horse slobber green, and only she and I, understood it. Hope things are going well for you.

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